Don't let this be you.
"A local man was arrested for suspicion of attempted murder, after trying to break into area house, with a duffel bag full of deadly weapons. Police responded after the homeowners called police. The suspect was described as a dangerous looking man with facial tattoos who constantly listened to Death Metal and gave the neighbors menacing looks. The victims had recently installed an alarm system after being told by the suspect that 'I am going to kill you, and eat your face.'" That's right! The, I Never Suspected A Thing, He Was So Quiet And Kept To Himself School. Featuring such classes as: White panel vans draw attention, Pentagrams on the front lawn are a no-no, People remember scary looking people with facial tattoos skulking around, and more.
After you attend our class you will be able to ride the bus without staring hollowly at the passengers and muttering under your breath about "slaughtering the sheep", instead you will be able to sit quietly and stare vacantly out the window, drawing no suspicion. You will learn that the best place for your private room filled with your detailed drawings, newspaper clippings, and magazine pictures with the eyes cut out is not in the living room, but perhaps a back room or a basement. And these are just a few of the tips you will learn.
Yes, for only an arm and a leg, you can attend classes at our secluded campus, and learn how to blend in with the disgusting meat bags, and one day maybe they'll say, "I never suspected a thing, he was so quiet and kept to himself", about you!
