I consolidated the stories about Fred.

HILL BLOCKS VIEW IS DEAD.

...long live, Hill Blocks View. I miss writing. But the thought of one more round of "welcome backs", or obsessing over stats, or thinking of the clever response to a comment, or the obligation to read everyone else's blog... not so much. So I'll try and write. No pressure. If you feel the need to respond, you can email me. I like email. flipaul@yahoo.com

Saturday, February 25, 2012

My GPS Is Stupid And Bossy! And It Smells Like Poop.


I don't know what it is with kids these days. They think they know everything. Lately my 2 1/2 year old has taken to shouting driving instructions at me from the back seat. Like some always inaccurate, drooling GPS.
   Last month I was driving down the road and he shouted out, "That way!" (Idiot.) That way was a pond. It cost me like $400 to get my car pulled out of the water.


   Then a couple of weeks later I was getting onto the freeway and he screamed, "This way daddy, this way!" He just doesn't understand that freeways are strictly one way. And yet when the cop was writing out my ticket, he totally let me take the fall. Selfish stupid toddler.
   Finally, yesterday, we decided to go to McDonalds to get some delicious chicken pieces-parts for lunch. That's when he noticed the playland and demanded I go, "That way." He is SO bad at this. We totally drove right through the window. I can't believe that this moron is the fruit of my loins. His every decision is tragically, incredibly wrong.