I was at my court mandated therapist's office the other day, and I couldn't remember what floor I parked on. I thought, it sure would be nice to have an elevator operator in this elevator to tell me which floor the ground floor was. I wonder why they did away with elevator operators? I bet many people, like me, would love someone to have pleasant small talk with while being guided knowledgeably and confidently to their destination. I could do it, I have lots of spare time now that Nickelodeon is no longer running a four hour power block of Full House episodes. I bet people would even tip me.
I love the idea of bringing back the old time glamor, but not the uniform that accompanies it. Every since I was a young lad in the Girl Scouts, I have had an aversion to uniforms. I think in my new elevator operator gig, I will dress a little more informally. Sometimes elevators are SO hot! If I'm working on one of those elevators, I'll wear a banana hammock. But you can't walk through a lobby wearing a speedo, so I'll wear a raincoat until I get to the elevator. I'll even dress up for special occasions, for instance at the start of hockey season I'll wear a hockey mask. This is gonna be great.
